The first book I read after I decided to go on hiatus ended up being the most encouraging book I could possibly have picked up. I have a hard time giving myself breaks. I just pile on and pile on, and sometimes I don’t stop until I crash.
This is especially true with my reading. While I love reading, sometimes I treat it a little too much like a job. And that is what happened after I got back from vacation. I was forcing myself to get through books for review, and I was behind on ARCs. It was just too much pressure and it became one of the few times I no longer enjoyed reading. When that happens, it is time for me to step back.
But when I do that, I have that nagging sense of failure in the back of my head. That’s what keeps me going on too long. I decided to take a break, give up on The Passenger for now and come back to it when I was in a better mindset, and I took up with Shonda Rhimes next few days. I didn’t rush–I read some Drarry, started brainstorming a vacation, worked on a project–I just read when I felt like it. It was wonderful. Shonda was there when I needed her.
And she really, really was. This book is HILARIOUS. Shonda does not hold back on her emotions, SHE TALKS IN CAPITAL LETTERS. You can just tell, she writes like she talks, like I do. I love people who do that. It makes me feel like I am sitting next to her on the couch with a big glass of red wine, putting in some veal practice, commiserating about all of the awful things in our lives–and celebrating all the wonderful things too! It’s the kind of book that makes you understand where those girls’ nights came from in Greys–with Mer and Callie and Bailey…and sometimes Alex. THIS IS THE WOMAN WHO CAME UP WITH OUR FAVORITE WOMEN.
Shonda Rhimes gets my anxiety. She gets ALLLLL of my anxieties. She’s an introvert. She hates public speaking. She has THROWN A CHICKEN BONE ACROSS THE ROOM AT A PARTY. And she worries about pooping in front of graduation crowds. But she gets her badass self out of the house and does her badass life anyway.
For me, it was pertinent that I say YES to giving myself a break. But I know that I can say YES to restarting the blog now that I have my ducks in order. I’m going in a great direction–I’m stronger than ever, doing things that make ME happy. And that’s what is important. Thanks for sticking with me!