Can we talk for a minute?
When I started this blog, I loved reading so much it was coming out of my pores. I wanted to read harder books, more interesting books. I wanted to better comprehend what I was reading, and I wanted to find a community where I could discuss the books I was reading. I felt like I would read a book, put it down, and forget about it the second I picked up another. I thought by writing down my experience, I would better experience the thousands of pages my eyeballs were scanning every year.
And so, I Lay Reading was born. It has accomplished all of those things. I’ve read so many books I never would have otherwise, I’ve met some amazing people–some of whom have become my best friends. I’ve learned new techniques for comprehension.
Beyond that, I never would have expected how much ILR helped me grow as a person. The political climate of the last few years helped, of course, as well, but running a blog such as this one really taught me to open my eyes to circles outside my own scope. I’m extremely thankful for that experience.
Unfortunately, I haven’t always been up to that task, and as my mental illness has gotten worse, it’s taken quite a toll on me. I no longer have the spoons to keep up with social media as I once did, and I feel I am missing crucial conversations that I need to participate in to be the best blogger I can be. I also am no longer finding the joy in reading that I used to, due to the pressure I’m putting on myself to put out such a rigid blogging schedule. My career workload just suddenly increased, and I no longer have near the time to devote to what is a non-paying second job.
Technically I have this domain until July–that’s when my next payment is due. I was going to keep going until then, as it seems a waste of money to shut down before then. But when my friend Maren posted her Farewell earlier today, it gave me the courage to pull the plug myself.
There is a possibility that I will be back. My brain never likes to be without a project for long, and I do still have this site for another half a year. But for now, I need to give myself a break. To those of you who have followed and supported me for so long, thank you. To those of you I have met along the way, I love you. See you in the next chapter.